I can recall the times while sitting in my mother’s kitchen as an undergrad that there were times when we would be in deep conversation. But there were also times when, as my mother was speaking, I would have a thought regarding the subject, but I just did not feel like opening my mouth. I just listened. My mother and I were very close. We often would start talking at the same time saying the exact same words. A friend of the family stopped by one day to visit with my mother and witnessed our speaking in sync. She said that she had never seen anything like that before in her life. It was normal for us. Sometimes you do not need words if you have a close relationship with somebody. They can pretty much read your mind. Even so, it is always a good policy to think before you speak. In other words, weigh your words. You do not want to hurt someone’s feelings. Furthermore, it is a good idea to make sure that you have all your facts straight before voicing your opinion on anything. As it states in James 1:26, “We who consider ourselves religious actually deceive ourselves if we do not keep a tight reign on our tongues.” Outward acts of religion do not mean anything if your words are callous. Our religion becomes worthless if our hearts have not been transformed. I often say that it is not what you say but how you say it. James 1:19 says, “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” James 1:20 clarifies why we should adhere to James 1:19. When we speak out of anger, our speech does not produce the righteousness that God expects from us. Take a deep breath and count to 10. Pausing helps us gather our thoughts and speak with love rather than hostility. Weigh your words.

By Jacqueline C. Winston